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ABC diet

day1: 500 calories(or less)
day2: 500 calories(or less)
3:300 calories
4:400 calories
5: 100 calories
6: 200 calories
7: 300 calories
8: 400 calories
9: 500 calories
10: fast
11: 150 calories
12: 200 calories
13: 400 calories
14: 350 calories
15: 250 calories
16: 200 calories
17: fast
18: 200 calories
19: 100 calories
20: fast
21: 300 calories
22: 250 calories
23: 200 calories
24: 150 calories
25: 100 calories
26: 50 calories
27: 100 calories
28: 200 calories
29: 200 calories
30: 300 calories
31: 800
32: fast
33: 250 calories
34: 350 calories
35: 450 calories
36: fast
37: 500 calories
38: 450 calories
39: 400 calories
40: 350 calories
41: 300 calories
42: 250 calories
43: 200 calories
44: 200 calories
45: 250 calories
46: 200 calories
47: 300 calories
48: 200 calories
49: 150 calories
50: fast

I know i need to eat... im not stupid... but i just cant the thought of shovelling food into me makes me feel sick.
I hate how food can have such a control over me... but i love it.
I know im not morbidly obese... but it sure as hell looks like it to me.
I used to love being told i looked nice... but i hate them so much because its all one big lie

Over the past year ive got more and more OCD... nothing major just little stuff... in school i'll write in my exercise books and if i make the tinniest spelling mistake i rip it out and start again, even if its underlining in a colour that doesnt suit or even if ive already re written it 10 times.
Things have to be in patterns, the other day i tipped out the entire contents of a quality streets chocolate box... dont worry didnt eat any... but had to arrange it so it was completely symetrical, 
blues, oranges, oranges, reds, golds, golds, purples, browns, greens, green triangles

I dont know what i think about what im turning into... and yet im happy because i know at the end of my life i will be thin... no matter WHAT.

Why is everyone so thin

what did i do?

why am i not loosing weight im not eating anything

helpppp